Metro Detroit's Catholic community divided on gay marriage

Catholic Church leaders are pushing back against gay marriage, even as public acceptance of same-sex nuptials grows among church members and the public at large.

Earlier this month, Detroit Archbishop Allen Vigneron took the stance that Catholics who support gay marriage should not take Communion, sparking an uproar on both sides of the issue.

"The Church can never, never change its stance on the man/woman relationship being the only kind of marriage there can be," said Jay McNally, former Michigan Catholic editor. "What we need is good, sound teaching from the bishops, and that is what Vigneron was trying to do."

Gay rights supporters say the archbishop and other church leaders are coercing members in a doomed effort to stop wider acceptance of same-sex marriage.

"The Archbishop is on the wrong side of history, which, in the context of the Vatican, should surprise no one," said David Garcia, executive director of Affirmations, Michigan's largest lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender organization.

Garcia, who says he was raised a Catholic, added, "I would suggest to Archbishop Vigneron that he concentrate on feeding and clothing the poor and nursing the sick and stay out of our bedrooms."

According to a statement from the Archdiocese of Detroit, Vigneron wasn't trying to target gay marriage necessarily, but to affirm the teachings of the church.

"He simply restated some basic principles about a Catholic's reception of Holy Communion," the statement reads. "If a Catholic publicly opposes the Church on a serious matter of the Church's teaching, any serious matter — for example, whether it be a rejection of the divinity of Christ, racist beliefs, support for abortion, or support for redefining marriage — that would contradict the public affirmation they would make of the Church's beliefs by receiving Communion."

The controversy comes as polls show growing support for gay marriage.

According to a survey released last week by NBC and the Wall Street Journal, 53 percent of respondents supported same-sex marriage, with 42 percent opposed. Both numbers have increased since December, according to the poll, which asked 1,000 adults between April 5-8. The poll had a margin of error of 3.1 percent.

Same-sex marriage also holds majority support among Catholics, according to a March poll conducted by Quinnipiac University. The poll shows 54 percent of Catholic voters support it, while 38 percent oppose it. The poll had a margin of error of 4.4 percent.

Despite the poll numbers, Dr. Edward Peters, who teaches Catholic canon law at Sacred Heart Major Seminary in Detroit, said in an e-mail Tuesday that he is not worried about the church alienating its members by speaking out against gay marriage.

"Church teaching on, say, the nature of marriage, on the licit expression of sexual pleasure in marriage, on the obligations of Catholics to act in accord with their identity as Catholics, and so on, is very, very old," he said. "It should therefore surprise no one. What's new in all this, at least for many, is hearing such points made succinctly and consistently, from the perspectives of Church and pastoral care, even in the face of strong opposition."

Retired Bishop Thomas Gumbleton, who plans to lead an LBGT-friendly service May 5 at Marygrove Chapel in Detroit, says Catholics have received some conflicting messages lately, citing a statement from Cardinal Timothy Dolan, archbishop of New York.

"When the people come, they are acknowledged as gay and lesbian people. But as Cardinal Dolan said, we want them to come to church. There are some priests who don't agree with that. So either we do want them to come or we don't," said Gumbleton.

As for LGBT individuals and supporters being told they can't take communion, Gumbleton said, "Many are hurt that way."

A group of Catholics who support Vigneron's stance say they will rally at Marygrove before Gumbleton's 6 p.m. service.

"We're going to support what the Archbishop said, which is people who publicly dissent from church teachings (shouldn't take Communion)," said organizer David Theisen of White Lake. For some pastors, it can be difficult to find balance between obeying the leadership and serving parishioners of various backgrounds.

The Rev. Ben Hawley is the pastor at St. Mary's Student Parish in Ann Arbor, which serves the University of Michigan and has had a church group for LGBT members for the past 10 years, created at the request of a former bishop in Lansing.

"The first responsibility of any Catholic parish — and I assume of almost any religious institution — is to help people reconnect with the God who really exists," Hawley said.

"Part of this reconnection is to come to a commitment to the moral life through reflection on tradition, teachings and scripture, because one honors God by living a moral life," said Hawley.

The church's traditions and the teachings of Jesus are paramount to Marcy Dlugopolski, a Catholic from Lincoln Park. She said Vigneron was reminding people of those teachings.

"I think the basic truths, they don't change. I think what happens with us, is some things are popular, some things are not. But if it's really truth, does truth change? No," said Dlugopolski. "No matter how many different variations you try to come up with, the truth will always remain the truth."

But Mary Therese Lemanek says she has come to a different understanding of truth. The Catholic from Allen Park says she has a family member who is gay and over the years, she has changed her mind about inclusivity in the church.

"When we celebrate the Eucharist, everyone comes around the table and we're all blessed and broken people. There was never any check at the door. Everybody was invited," said Lemanek. "Even though Vigneron was trying to clarify it, certainly the way it came across was that you need to remove yourself. It irritated me and it saddened me, but it's not going to stop me."